Sunday, July 27, 2014

Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter (2001) and Adding Monsters to Established Stories



Since the inception of the Sunday “Bad” Movies, or near enough to the beginning for it to count as the beginning, I have been a large proponent of retelling stories in a new fashion.  Most stories end up being a retelling of something already covered in a movie or book previously.  The effort and originality at this point in time mainly comes from changing the story up in a way that makes it feel new again.  If an unoriginal story can be told in an original way, the person behind making it so deserves recognition and praise.  It takes courage and talent to pull it off in a successful way.

More recently, a trend in updating stories has begun that is not a simple modernization of old material, or a change of setting.  This trend changes large elements of the original story to create something almost wholly new.  Something is added into the story to make it more rambunctious, more kinetic, more frenetic.  Action is infused into a story that does not necessarily involve action, and this action revolves around the concept of monsters.  That’s right, many writers in the movie industry are trying to find ways in which to bring classic stories into the limelight again by tossing some monsters into them.

The first of these films that comes to mind is Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter which is based on the book by Seth Grahame-Smith.  It tells a story about Abraham Lincoln’s secret life as a vampire hunter, which was still going on while he was president.  I haven’t read the book or seen the movie so I can’t go into too much detail on what happens in the new version of Lincoln’s life.  I can tell you for a fact that in reality, Abraham Lincoln was not actually killing vampires while campaigning for presidency or while he was president.  That’s because vampires do not exist.  What I can do for you is go into some sort of detail about a movie that Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter inspired.

The Asylum is a movie company that always jumps on the chance to make money off of what seems like a big ticket property.  When the movie Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter was nearing its release, The Asylum released a movie on home video titled Abraham Lincoln vs. Zombies.  It retold Abraham Lincoln’s secret monster-hunting life, except this time it had zombies instead of vampires.  It ended up being one of the better Asylum movies that I have seen.  But it wasn’t exactly true to the life of Abraham Lincoln.  There were characters in the movie such as a child Theodore Roosevelt who surely never met Abraham Lincoln while hiding from zombies.  The closest that those two ever came to meeting was Teddy Roosevelt watching Lincoln’s funeral procession.  Of course, a movie about a zombie-hunting president is not about the historical accuracy.  It is about the fun, and boy, this movie was fun to watch.  It’s been a while since I saw it, but I had a good time with it.

Another movie I had a good time with that uses this same monster addition to an old tale is this week’s Sunday “Bad” Movie, Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter.  Released in the year 2001, the movie takes the popular biblical figure and places him in present day Canada.  It does not really tell the same story as the Bible; instead, the movie shows Jesus Christ saving the lesbians of Ottawa from the vampires that are out to kill them.  That’s right.  You read that correctly.  Jesus Christ takes down some lesbian-hating vampires.  He uses his martial arts skills to do it, and gets help from a motorcycle riding Mary Magnum and a wrestler named Santos.  The movie is a mixture of martial arts, music, and farce.  It also takes a very old tale and puts a fun new spin on it.

Finally, we come to a movie that takes a story that originally had monsters and only amped up the action to make a dark children’s tale into an all-out action film.  The movie that I’m talking about in this case is Hansel and Gretel: Witch Hunters.  The original Hansel and Gretel story is about two children who end up lost in the woods and almost eaten by a witch.  In this re-imagining of the childhood classic, the two siblings become hunters who want to take down every witch that they discover.  They have guns and other weapons to help them in their quest.  It is an amped up version of the classic tale made for the short attention span of today’s audiences.  It’s more energetic to keep people interested in what is happening on screen.

There is also another Hansel and Gretel movie released by The Asylum with the subtitle Warriors of Witchcraft.  I haven’t seen the movie and it is not as big a name as some of these other movies so the most I am going to touch on it is to say that it exists.  I cannot go into detail about it because having not seen it leaves me at a loss of what the movie actually is.

Each of these movies has one thing in common.  They tried to freshen up an old tale, whether historical or fictional, by adding action and/or monsters.  Sometimes this melding worked and sometimes it didn’t.  But it always made for an interesting watch.  Seeing a new interpretation of a story that has been told numerous times throughout the history of literature and film is always interesting.  Even if the movie turns out to be bad, the fact that the idea was attempted is interesting in itself.

The concept of adding monsters into classic stories or historical events is one that excites me.  It gives a new way to tell a tale that has been told many times before.  I am a big fan of finding new ways to tell stories and think that a lot of originality in this day and age comes from the ability to do that.  Each of the movies that I wrote about in this post found a way to retell a well-known story in a new way, with monsters.  Some were more successful than others, but that’s how movies work.  And it’s the magic of movies that keeps me going.

There are some notes I have to give here:

  • Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter was suggested for the Sunday "Bad" Movies by @filmslikedreams.
  • In my post for Rise of the Zombies, I wrote about The Asylum and the “rules” to their movies.  In my post for Snakes on a Train, I wrote about my history with watching movies from The Asylum.
  • I wrote about retelling stories in different settings and how that shows originality in my post for Jonah: A Veggietales Movie.
  • My post for April Fools was about stories being repeated in different films.
  • I watched a Hansel and Gretel movie for the Sunday “Bad” Movies that was titled Hansel and Gretel Get Baked.  It was one of four Hansel and Gretel movies released in 2013.
  • Can you think of any other movies that take an old story and add monsters to make it more interesting?  Discuss them in the comments.
  • If you have any suggestions for future movies to be included in the Sunday “Bad” Movies, feel free to suggest them below.  Or you can contact me on Twitter to give me movie ideas.

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